This week we will be sharing our own reflections on how the events over the last week have affected us and our acknowledgment of our need to confess and learn together. I am thankful for the writers’ willingness to be vulnerable and share their thoughts. We are not experts when it comes to talking about race and anti-racism, we are learners on this journey with you. I hope that you read our articles with grace and see them as an invitation to a conversation with me or any of us.
Pastor Joanna Mitchell
Please pray with me: Holy Spirit, you stir up the winds of change around us and lift up the voices of all people. We hear the cries of your people today, especially people of color who cry out about injustice. Help us to listen with curious ears and give us curious hearts so that we might learn and be transformed together. We pray this in the name of your Holy Spirit, who is guiding us forward. Amen
My white suburban middle class “bubble” was made evident a week ago Thursday when I showed up for my appointment at Midas. Taylor, the store manager, greeted me by asking if I had seen the news about the riots in Minneapolis. I had not. I had spent the prior evening on a zoom meeting, so I hadn’t watched the news as usual. Since I also felt overwhelmed by the double whammy of the COVID-19 milestone and the death of George Floyd, I had decided not to watch any news after my meeting or again in the morning. I had been free to jog through our neighborhood that morning and get ready for my day with NO inkling of what had transpired. “Did you see what happened in Minneapolis last night?!” I was suddenly and acutely made aware of the bubble I live in daily, unaware of the life and death struggle of my brothers and sisters, my neighbors in south Minneapolis.
When we think and talk about racism, we also need to think and talk about privilege. In looking back at my childhood, I now realize the middle-class privilege I was born into. Our family did not consider ourselves “wealthy,” but because my dad often worked 2 or 3 jobs, he provided a good and consistent income. We lived in an average three-bedroom home in the suburbs. I still do not consider myself “spoiled” per se, but I never lacked for anything I needed to live. In fact, the only thing I remember wanting but not getting in my first 18 years of life was a new pair of basketball shoes my senior year in high school. But, wait, isn’t this actually a description of being wealthy, of being privileged, and of being spoiled?? Can I accept this rather than deny my privilege?
I was on the track team during college and about half of my fellow sprinters were people of color who came from places quite different from Minnesota: Morocco, Uganda, Mauritius, Nigeria, the South Side of Chicago and Brooklyn, New York. Ellie, who was from the South Side of Chicago, shared with me (after three years of training together) that every time she entered any local fast food restaurants with a white person, the restaurant employees would look the white person in the eyes and ask for their order first. I was shocked. And unaware, and perhaps more accurately, totally clueless.
My senior year in college I had an experience that helped me realize what it felt like to be treated differently because of my skin color. As I prepared for the start of a race, I saw that I was the only white person. It was a strange feeling. The other runners were all talking among themselves and no one included me. As we moved to the track, their socializing continued, and I was the only one standing by my starting blocks as they stood together laughing and chatting. Many thoughts popped into my head as I stood alone but what I remember most is thinking, “I can’t win! I can’t beat them!” First, this IS racist thinking. I wasn’t comparing or judging myself against the other runners based on their talent or ability but on the color of their skin. Second, I realized in that moment what it might be like to instead be the only person of color in our white dominated society. Third, I realized how quickly the negative self-talk entered: “I can’t win!” I was defeated in my thinking before I even started the race. What would it be like to have these thoughts every day? What would it feel like to always be the outsider or constantly treated differently because of my skin color?
Today I realize that I am almost always completely unaware of the privilege that results from my skin color, upbringing, education, income, and zip code. I am also largely uneducated about the daily realities of racism, the far-reaching damage of systemic racism, and the devastating impact of the gaps in income, employment, and educational achievement between blacks and whites. I feel a need to confess my sins of ignorance, inattention and inaction.
Before the death of George Floyd, the song I had been listening to repeatedly this week was “Kyrie Eleison”, a song we also sing during worship. Kyrie Eleison means “Lord have mercy upon us”. I have included the link to this YouTube version and some of the lyrics below. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6T7n1j03UZA
For the things we’ve done and left undone
For the ways we’ve wandered from your heart
Forgive us, we pray
For the idols we put on your throne
For the loves we choose above your own
Forgive us, we pray
For the lies we clutch to our chests
For the fear that wants to steal our breath
Forgive us, we pray
Forgiving God
Forgiving us
Lord have mercy
Christ have mercy
Lord have mercy on us, on us
As white people, how do we begin to change? I think it starts with openness, willingness, confession, and learning. If you are interested in reading about racism and white privilege, below are some helpful books:
- Waking Up White by Debbie Irving
- White Awake by Daniel Hill
- Tears We Cannot Stop by Michael Eric Dyson
- I’m Still Here: Black Dignity in a World Made for Whiteness by Austin Channing Brown
- White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo
Below is a link to a recent article in Sojourners magazine, “For Our White Friends Desiring to be Allies”- https://sojo.net/articles/our-white-friends-desiring-be-allies
Another link to an article titled, “10 Simple Ways White People Can Step Up to Fight Everyday Racism” – https://everydayfeminism.com/2014/09/non-racist-white-person/?utm_content=buffer92b7c&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_campaign=buffer
If you are more interested in watching movies than reading, here are three recommendations:
- The Hate U Give
- BlacKKKlansman
- Just Mercy
God of All People – Open our eyes and hearts and minds to our brothers and sisters. Forgive us for the things we have done and left undone. Forgive us of our wrong thoughts. Lead us to new ways of seeing, thinking, living; and loving. Amen.
